If you looked at a list of your goals and dreams, picked one out and asked yourself, “Why do I want that?” And then took the answer you came up with and asked, “And, why do I want that?” And then asked the same question again, and so on, you’ll find almost everything you long for and are working towards comes down to one thing – the search for more happiness.
Let’s try it together. Say I set the goal of doubling my income next year. And you ask me why do you want to do that, why is that an important goal? I’d probably say because it will make life a little easier plus I’ll be able to buy some material things that I’d love to have like the totally remodeled, old house I’ve had my eye on. And then you asked me, “Why do you want life to be easier or want the new house?” Well, I’d say because those things seem like they’d be really comfortable and fun, add more to my life experience, etc. And you persisted and asked me why I wanted more fun, a better life experience, etc. Assuming I didn’t tell you to give me a break with all the damn questions, my final answer would be – “Because that will make me happy!”
And that’s where the big problem lies. We’ve been taught, and erroneously believe, that happiness is the effect of something from outside of us, an external cause that we may or may not control. And in believing that, we then put ourselves in the tenuous predicament of depending on outside causes, things, events and other people, for our daily happiness. For years I thought that once I made six figures I’d be happy. This turned out to be the opposite since I had no passion for my work.
Depending on something that you can’t control, things, events and other people, means happiness is going to be hit or miss at best and definitely not sustainable. For example, if your happiness today is based on how nice the weather is, gaining a new client or your wife being in a great mood, then the only way you’re going to be happy is if all of these stars align. And the bad news is you don’t control any of them.
Now for the good news – real, daily and lasting happiness is something that comes from within and you can control it. They don’t teach you this in school and you don’t hear it on the boob-tube or the Internet for a couple of reasons: 1) it doesn’t sell products, and 2) most people don’t know this to be true.
So, how do you do it? Stay tuned for Part 2 of this article. Cheers.
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